I woke up with the vision of your face. I started to catch my breath not for anything else but for wondering. Just wondering about you and these stupid emotions I keep hiding to myself. If sighs can only take away these feelings, I badly wish they could. Easy as it goes, I will do it over and over again. Yet no! No matter how deep the sigh is, my heart is trembling still.
I should have deal with this a long time ago. I didn't. I keep acting like it's normal. Like we are the best of friends. Rowdy and always horse playing only the two of us get. It's no code or something it just goes like how both of our eyestalk. We just know it or feel it when it does. However vague the message is, I still see through this emotion.
Though I know how should I resist and just be realistic. Why am I left gasping for breath whenever you fill up my mind? How do you act Normal normal? I keep denying it and the more I do the more I think about you. I maybe even obsessing too much for excuses sometimes. This is nothing and no one will understand or even has the time to listen to it. Whatever the hell creeps out of my heart, it's just simply wishful thinking for them.
I hate it when I would end up again with hate. Just to reverse an emotion I know nothing about in the first place. You're right I am scared not only because no one will understand, but because they judged you without asking. I understand that and would rather be it than tap their heads like, "Hey! Listen to me!". I like to play it indirectly playing and let myself catch the wisdom.
If I thought about you or imagine that it's just you and me. Does that mean beyond the boundaries of my fantasy? Why is it different? Why should we be seen so differently from everyone else's perspective? I feel more than normal humans would but it would seem like a big joke for them. Why should I feel stranger than what anybody else is feeling, that's even more strange. I feel it. I know I have felt it since...
Tags:
Personal